robby's blog

foot guy

Sunday, March 28th, 2010 | Uncategorized

And if you know what I’m talking about, there’s a 50% chance that you’re mad at me for it. Lovely.

So I went to the gymnastics homeshow with Kayla (because I’m broad-minded, I guess) and we watched “A Knight to Remember: the Battle for the City of Ur Sole.” Yes, I know that there are two puns in that. I didn’t write the program (as will become apparent if you keep reading).

Children came out and did some things. I was NOT that coordinated at that age. Then to the main program: there was a backdrop of a castle wall (exciting, I know) and some really overly-dramatic monologue, and then gymnastics to break it up. There was this one evil guy with some VERY ineffective troops (instead of going over the wall, they just ran up and down it, bouncing on trampolines. Fun times, I know. One girl had the height to go straight over the wall, but she just kept going sideways (fail). So the evil guy called his troops back and tried (?) to get into the city himself.

He got down on a weirdly shaped wooden thing and then twirled cylinders on his feet.

You read that correctly.

So I started calling him foot guy and making fun of him and laughing all the harder. The entire program, he was just walking around leering at things menacingly. And when you spend an hour leering at a wall and stroking it (he did stroke it twice), you come off as creepy, not evil. ANYWHOOZLE If you know me (and if you read this blog I hope that you do) then you know that I am full of sarcastic remarks that come spilling out of me at every turn. So this is where the narrative becomes sad. Brittney and Regina yelled at Kayla to shut me up and then I had to move. I didn’t really want to move, but Regina and Brittney have the power to make my life hell if they want, so I moved. Just the same, I don’t think they had as much fun as I did (and I don’t even like gymnastics). I just like Foot Guy and the . . . narrative, if you can call it that, that ran through the program. I made fun of it, yes. That’s how I enjoy things. I point out the inconsistencies. Like “Truck Alignment Specialist.” I don’t know how that’s supposed to make sense (SHUT UP I’M READING THE WORDS, NOT THE INTENT, I KNOW WHAT IT MEANS, IT WAS A SIGN ON TIRES, SHEESH) and I make fun of it.

And however much I enjoy myself, I sometimes regret being a massive dick. I AM and it’s not fun knowing it. I’m the kind of guy that I dislike seeing on the street. So I’m going to start holding myself in, reigning myself back, and making better decisions. I’m praying about it, so God will help. I hope. But today was not the day for it. Tour = tired, arriving at 7 = no sleep, Robby = wacky.

Take away from this:

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